


Mere Existence

by tomshardy



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Avengers Endgame, Avengers Endgame fix-it, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, BAMF Hela (Marvel), BAMF Loki (Marvel), Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Other, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Protective Peter Quill, Sad Thor, Thor (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Thor Angst, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-27
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-07 06:34:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18615112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tomshardy/pseuds/tomshardy
Summary: Loki, within quick succession decides to use the tesseract to voyage into the future when it appeared quite literally at his feet. What he happens upon is an almost unrecognisable Thor who now endures lost and grief, as well as possessing some gained pounds. [includes Endgame spoilers]chapter 3 is a oneshot





	1. New Asgard

**Author's Note:**

> A deserved interaction between Thor and Loki that we didn't get to see during Avengers Endgame yet what I wanted the most. Also, dad-bod Thor deserves to be happy and I still hope that we'll see the brothers hug in a future reunion someday.
> 
> and all hail joe russo, the first canon gay character in the mcu

 

**MERE EXISTENCE**

 

Loki despite all his faults, had always aimed to make the most of every situation. And so, as he was contained by the Avengers, he could only wait as the Migardians squabbled over the possession of the tesseract. It quickly became physical as the men opposing Tony Stark, evolved to snatching the briefcase out of his hands. What resulted unintendedly was a heart failure of some sorts from the Ironman. Now, every man cantered to the healthcare of Anthony, distantly Loki heard a man shout out to call the ambulance. How chaotic this environment had progressed to with such haste.

 _What a shame_ , Loki thought as he over watched the scene, feeling no ounce of care for the metalled Avenger, which greatly contrasted his not-brother who was quick to placate Mjolnir upon Ironman's chest in a reckless manner and then say, "I don't know if this will work," which greatly unnerved the surrounding men and women. Then, with a cautious tap upon the hammer, bolts of lightening surged through Tony, reviving him gloriously.

 

"I did it!" Thor cried out merrily, Loki rolling his eyes unconsciously to this common reaction from Thor, "you're alright now, Stark."

 Loki couldn't help but feel that something wasn't right. The scene was just, _too_ messy, however, perhaps it was just coincidence, or perhaps something else altogether. _A diversion_ , his mind concluded. This idea caused his eyes to narrow and he now overlooked the situation more meticulously and with more caution. Loki's suspicions began to raise when he watched the briefcase, seemingly all by itself, slide across the floor, away from the disorderly crowd and into the grasp of another SHIELD operator who then began to walk in the opposite direction all by oneself. _Now, that doesn't seem right_ , Loki could only think with thinly hid glee as it became apparent that there was more going on than what was seen by the ordinary eye. It was only when the gargantuan, immense beast that was the hulk, unexpectedly crashed through a pair of doors, knocking the reverent soldier down and protesting the words, 'Hulk hates stairs', did Loki smile, a full of joy that even reached his eyes, although it was concealed by the muzzle present on his face.

 

It was almost poetic to Loki when the briefcase opened in result of the impact from the Hulk and the tesseract slid across the floor, hitting the outside of his foot neatly. How could you have blamed him when he briskly looked at his occupied captors and then picked the enticing cube up into his grasp, using it's substantial powers to travel through time and space simultaneously, escaping through a cloud of smoke.

 

 

 

 

He would apologise to Thor at a later rate for his disappearance, but for now, Loki could only smirk as he travelled through the cosmos from yet another situation he made the most of through unexpectant and unplanned happenings.

 

**NEW ASGARD; ~~SOMEWHERE IN NORWAY~~**

**5 YEARS AFTER THE SNAP**

 

When Loki had used the tesseract to voyage away from his containment, he admittedly didn't have a place in mind to go. He was now a wielder of one of the most powerful artefacts in the entire galaxy, he could command time and space within a moment's breath, and he now emerged as an even more intimidating figure than before. Yet he didn't know where to go. The plan was to travel in chains back to Asgard with his valiant captor, Thor, and despite having to be confined within the claustrophobic walls of a cell, Loki would be provided with protection from the Mad Titan as to get to Loki, one would have to bypass the guards and barrios that Asgard possessing. An almost impossible and entirely feat that would be.

 Yet, with the tesseract in his grasp, Loki could now protect himself even more than before, however he risked being a principal target of the Titan's and would have to endure his wraith for hiding away with his stolen gem. _Perhaps going to Asgard would be the better option overall._

 

For now though, Loki found himself upon a grassy hill, overlooking a small village located beside the sea. The salty air which accumulated from the water cleared Loki's lungs and made breathing a bit more easier. The area around was almost desolate, with a few amount of men and women that Loki could see working at the docks, collecting goods and materials from the boats and sails.

 It was a crash that echoed behind Loki that caught his attention from the tranquil view. Peering around, Loki found a small home with high walls, the door wooden yet appeared standing on it's last hinges, as though someone had thrown something or themselves at it countless times. Curiously, Loki made his way over to the small building, noting that the door handle was not secured properly. It was a light touch from Loki's hand that effortlessly pushed the door open. The sight alone from the hallway caused Loki to bristle in scorn, but it was the smell that vehemently stenched the house that made Loki to force himself to remain resistant and carry on forward into the shack. 

The sight that was bestowed upon Loki truly and awfully astounded him.

 

_What in the hel is that?_

 

"Thor?" Spoken cautiously with a twinge of disbelief, Loki edged closer to the figure that resembled his brother yet not-brother all the same. The sight before Loki jarred him; Thor was the epitome of an Asgardian warrior, strong build and stature with admirable will and bravery, yet the man ahead of him was renowned to a sluggish lump of negligence. What once was a battle-envious, narcissistic boy was transformed into a contempt, restraint man who no longer sought out conflict, instead fought to integrate the nine realms together in harmony. Battle-worn and tired, the Thor in front of him was merely distinguishable to the Thor years ago when Asgard was prospering with her people and beauty. 

 

"Loki." It was the delicate way in which Thor spoke his name that took Loki aback, as well as the awestruck expression on Thor's face. He was lost in a daze as he stared at his little brother, and Loki hated how he couldn't exactly tell the emotions swirling in Thor's eyes. Thor was frozen but soon shook himself out of it as his face lightened, discernible stress lines that unnerved Loki disappeared slightly as a smile graced his face. "Norns be damned!" At least the jovial attitude of this Thor was familiar to Loki. "Is that truly you, brother?" This Thor now stood with wide, excited eyes, also shirtless which allowed a surprisingly prominent belly to protrude out.

The drastic change in appearance caused Loki to raise an eyebrow in question. It was true that Loki had definitely voyaged into the future for this was an extreme in appearance from the Thor he was with moments before. _O,_ _how have the years been kind to Thor_. Perhaps it was mean but the sight before him caused a slight satisfaction in Loki; always has Thor looked grandiose, every part of a son of Odin. And now look at him! To admit this, then Loki also could not ignore the twinge of concern he felt for Thor. A thousand years of worrying for his older brother, _not-brother_ , came back all at once and it confused Loki to an extensive amount. Such sentimentality, too much for Thanos to twist and warp for his own ideals. Shaking his head, Loki allowed a small smirk to present itself on his face as he began to speak. "Indeed it is. Although, forgive me for having to affirm that you are indeed Thor. You appear more as Volstagg than the son of Odin, with your generously gained pounds," _That was putting it lightly_ , "- and that, truly fine beard." _An unruly one as well._

 

"Aye, well, to speak honestly I've done more feasting and drinking than-" An unmannerly burp erupted from Thor causing Loki's nose to wrinkle in disgust, "than battling and fighting. But never mind that. Here you are! If only you came mere hours before, you would have been able to meet my friends Korg and Miek! Funny guys they are, really, you see Korg is made of rocks, you might actually find some laying around, and he also has this interesting accent. Miek has these scissors for hands, it's incredible! -Wait, but you have already met Korg and Miek! I must apologise brother, my mind these days are not at it's best. Anyway, Korg-"

Bewildered and perplexed were the best words to summarise Loki in that moment. Thor's mumbled ramble didn't make a sense to Loki, especially as the names Korg and Miek were unfamiliar to Loki but Thor is claiming that they have already met? And one was made of rocks? Absolutely baffling.

"-he has taken to wearing shirts. Speaking on clothes, you are back to your greens and golds, fantastic! Don't get me wrong, you wore the blues and yellows finely but you have suited every shade of green better from forest green to emerald, also to olive and finally to, erm, grass green, yes. But less on colours and more on happenings! I was alone but I made friends with a tree. In our time together, we conversed well together. Oh! How could I have almost forgotten about the rabbit!"

"Thor." Loki spoke firmly, ceasing Thor's rambling to an end. Thor looked dejected for a moment but he quickly Loki forward at Loki eagely, awaiting his response. "You are inebriated." Loki, with disdain spoke what was evident.

Thor's expression dropped once again, turning his head as he began to venture the small home. His movements were slow as his feet trudged his gained weight around. "Only a few drinks, I swear it." Thor casually waved his hand nonchalantly, but his laughable coordination said otherwise. Loki regarded Thor carefully, watching as he stumbled around a room that was not fit for a prince of Asgard. The satisfaction that Loki had once felt at the pitying sight was quickly fading away to guilt to having had felt such foul emotions to begin with.  

 

"What's the cause of this celebration then?" Loki spoke, clearing his head of feeling guilt, "you only either drink for celebration or socially. And it's apparent that you are home alone."

 

At least Thor had the awareness to look at least the slightest bit embarrassed. "Aye, well yes. I guess I am celebrating the, erm, the su-sucess of New Asgard. Yes! Our trade has been successful so far and the remaining Asgardians have adapted well to this climate and environment. Also, the Valkyrie-Brunnhilde, I mean, has been a fine leader indeed. Eh, well, I am the leader, supposed to be, however Val has done a fine job indeed, wouldn't you agree?"

_New Asgard? Remaining Asgardians? Valkyrie?_ It's becoming apparent that the more Thor speaks, the more sense Loki loses from what he's saying. "I truly haven't looked around properly." Loki felt that was just enough to reply, for he wasn't quite sure what else to say without confusing himself further.

"Aye brother, I should take you around sometime. It's truly impressive. Our farmland is prospering and many communities have been built from what I've heard. Also, a public garden has been created and how beautiful it is! It provides solace and peace for those requesting it, an idea from myself actually, to keep the Old Asgard present through the new. That then takes me to the memorial-" Thor began to trail off, his voice losing it's volume and tone, becoming more quieter and himself becoming more withdrawn. It was as though Thor realised something mid speaking for now he spoke no more, merely looking down at his hands but not truly seeing.

Loki waited, thinking it best for Thor to speak when he wanted rather than to attempt to drawl it out of him, himself. That was what it was like when they were children, and things hadn't changed since as Thor began shaking his head, taking a breath in and began to speak.

 

"This, whatever _this_ is, isn't real." It seem as though Thor had collapsed and was now struggling to hold himself together. " _You're_ not real. This is only a farce, a play of my mind." Thor quickly took to incohesive rambling as he began to wander aimlessly around the small confines of the shack, picking up and setting things down without purpose.

Loki couldn't stop his look of concern when Thor walked heavily into the wooden table, resulting in the clatter of empty bottles onto the floor. "With care Thor. " Loki advised, taking a step forward, he reached his hand out to steady his brother. **** ~~~~

 "No!" Thor was quick to manuver himself around the table, making it a barrier between himself and Loki. Thor's repulsed reaction to Loki's hand caused the latter to recoil, a bitter smile replacing the smirk once present on his gaunt face. "Still you cannot bear the touch of a frost giant." Old wounds still hut the deepest it seemed.

 

Thor's brows furrowed as he shook his head in disagreement, letting out a mumbled chorus of no's. "Not at all, no. These, these dreams, or imagings, or whatever they may be, always end with our touch. Every single time." This for Thor was the optimum time for a long swing of the bottled beer he found discarded on a chaotic counter, complete with filthy plates and leftover food. "I forget sometimes but not this time, no, I intend for this to last."

Loki wasn't quite sure how to react. This Thor has entirely fallen off the deep end, so it seems. Raising his hands slowly, Loki presented himself as he spoke what he believed to be the obvious, "I'm here, Thor."

This caused Thor to laugh humourlessly, his hands now fiddling with a small object, an ornament perhaps, contemplating something as he threw the thing in the air and caught it a few times. Looking over at Loki with wistful eyes, dissimilar coloured eyes Loki then just noticed, "no, you are not."

 "Why do you insist me gone, Thor?" Loki took a step closer to Thor, grasping the edge of the table in almost desperation. Uncertainty began to flood Loki as he attempted to make sense of the situation, "I came back. I'm _here_." It was childish memories that had now grappled Loki, of when he was younger and when he was afraid to be separated from his big brother. It was inevitable though, the separation, because as they got older and Thor made new friends, he spent less time with his little brother and this disheartened the young boy, making Loki feel abandoned and caused him to grasp onto their waning bond in desperation as the last thing Loki wanted was to be away from his brother forever; to be what Thor insisted he was now, gone.

"I watched you die, Loki." The mournful words struck Loki as pained eyes glistened at him. "You are not here."

 

Loki didn't reply. He mind was now drowned out with memories of the Bifrost; him gripping to the golden, seeking his father's, _not-father's_ validation and acceptance yet received none. Images of him now letting go, falling to his own demise now contrasted heavily with what he thought of Thor throwing him off the bridge to be true. He didn't know what to make sense of it anymore. Pondering densely caused his head to feel as though it was being split in half, and so he stopped. Instead, he watched Thor grab yet another bottled beer and used a truly magnificent axe to clip the top off. This was yet just another detail that confused Loki for where was Thor's beloved Mjolnir? This imposing weapon was more spectacular than the hammer and was truly more imposing in appearance. For where would Thor have gone to have retrieved this weapon?

This silence prickled at Loki's skin as Thor collapsed unceremoniously upon a chair, his belly more bulging than ever. His gaze was downcast, shoulders slumped and hands weakly gripping the arms of the chair. The image of a defeated warrior; one sorrowed with pessimism and depleted of hope. It was pathetic, in Loki's opinion but also unnerving for never has he seen Thor so vanquished before. This wasn't the Thor he knew. Thor should be gallivanting around with irritating jubilation, and with his bellowing voice be crying out for an opponent for a battle. Not wallowing in his own self pity. Loki hated this.

Thor eventually raised his head, his face now streaked with tears, avoiding Loki's stare altogether. He cleared his voice and began to speak, a bitter and forced smile upon his face. "You know, I've had a lot to think about recently, so much time yet with nothing to do. And so I think, and I've come to the conclusion that this must be some punishment of some sorts, the Norns gifting me with this retribution for failing." Thor shook his head and let out a sullen laugh, "it's deserved however. I didn't avenge our people or you. I didn't do the one act, the finalising feat right."

This outpour of grief and self-hatred made Loki's stomach twist in worry as he listened to his despaired bother. Such sentiment, a voice echoed in his mind yet he didn't pay it any heed for his attention was on Thor. With a soft voice, he spoke. "What did you not do right, Thor?"

 

Thor finally looked up at Loki, his face contorted in remorse and guilt. "I didn't go for his head until it was too late."

 

"Whose head was this, Thor?" Loki encouraged softly, his expression devoid of any past aggression or hate for his brother. Now, it only held worry and care.

Thor began to shake his head, his face contorting in pain and barely veiled anger. His eyes were full of begging, desperation found there as well. "Don't, make me, say his name." Thor barely got out, his voice thick with emotion, eyes welling up with tears. Loki could only wonder who this 'he' was, who scared and angered his brother, who caused this much pain for his brother that he couldn't hear the name out loud. A part of Loki already knew the answer, despite how much he wanted to deny it, he knew it to be true.

"Alright brother, you need not say his name." The gratitude in Thor's eyes was almost overwhelming for Loki, the latter quickly looking elsewhere to avoid his brother's gaze.

 Silence then overtook the two brothers, Loki stood tersely, unsure of what to do or say while Thor remained in his chair, gazing out upon the small town renowned as 'New Asgard'. There were so many questions which created even more questions in which evaded Loki's mind, begging for answers and solutions to the dilemmas that were brought up due to his travel through time. Loki wanted to ask, but he believed it best to allow Thor to rest, be free of questions now that may be asked at a later rate. It appeared quite evidently that Thor deserved just as much; he looked aged beyond his years and altogether tired, for ruling and leading does that. He saw it in his father and not-father all-the-same; the tremendous weighted pressure of conducting a fair reign over your people while also producing an intimidating appearance towards invading realms, doing everything in your power to meet the commands of your people while also knowing where and when to set boundaries, and knowing when and where to delegate, seeking out and trusting your advisors when needs be. He didn't know what to say of Odin's rule having been his son, for most times when he longed for a father, he got the king instead. 

Loki understands that Thor eventually became the leader of Asgard, King of the Nine Realms. Resemblance of Odin shone bright through Thor. What he didn't understand is what had happened that made Thor this way. He spoke of New Asgard, which Loki could conclude to be the small village where Thor resided in, which only brought a multitude of questions on what had happened to the 'old' Asgard. He didn't know what to think of 'the remaining Asgardians'. This small village was indeed small, and doesn't look to be able to house even one tenth of Asgard's population. And Thor befriending a Valkyrie-how on earth Thor had managed to even speak to a Valkyrie let alone be friends with one equally bewildered Loki as everything did. 

Looking over at Thor, Loki could see how tired he was and he pitied the sight. Thor now rested with discomfort in the chair too small to manage his new figure, his unwashed hair covered parts of his face as his neck stayed bent at an awkward angle. 

 

With a sigh, Loki began walking towards his older brother, his unalike appearance becoming ever more distinct the nearer Loki edged towards him. You would expect one to be relaxed during sleep, face devoid of movement and not contorted in any way, yet, Thor was distressed and this was clearly apparent in his twisted face, his eyebrows furrowed in sorrow and mouth moving, saying unspoken words. He was having a nightmare. With pursed lips, Loki placed a hand upon his brother's forehead, allowing a flow of his seidr to calm his brother down and removed any sign of anguish present.

"Sleep well, brother." Loki spoke aloud softly, giving his shoulder one last shake before using the tesseract once more.

 

 

 

**THE DAY AFTER**

 

Thor awoke to the warm curtain of light upon his face, his attention immediately going to his splitting head. "By the Norns." Thor groaned out miserably, his hands attempt to rub the pain away. The light from the window seemed brighter than ever which did nothing to ease the pain of his headache. Squeezing his eyes shut, he fumbled carelessly for the sunglasses he had recently become adored towards. Finally finding them, with haste he placed them over his eyes, soothing that pain away to his relief. Moving slowly, his body cried out in pain due to the uncomfortable position he slept in last night yet he persisted and sat up, yawning gracelessly. Slowly, memories of yesterday returned to Thor, one at a time. He recalled drinking, Korg and Miek, drinking some more, and Loki.

_Loki_.

Hope blossomed quickly within Thor. He was here. I saw him. He's _alive_. But Thor had also watched him die. He wasn't here. He's not alive. And just like that, Thor had lost all hope, it disappeared as soon as it arrived and Thor found himself sorrowed in grief once again. It usually happened like this; he would drink a copious amount, fall asleep, and have these imagings of old Asgard, some of his dear mother, a few of his father, however, a multitude of them were of Loki. Just as yesterday. But yesterday seemed _so_ real.

His head now felt heavier than before, his mood greatly lessened, and the desire to just sit there and do nothing was entirely inviting. _Such a leader he was_ , Thor could only think bitterly. He was supposed to be a strong figure for the remaining Asgardians, an inspiration to look upon, yet here he was, wallowing away alone in this home of his. Absolutely pathetic.

 "Come one, Thor. You can do this."

And with that, Thor carried on through yet another day; having Korg and Miek visit helped more than Thor could ever say, their mere presence helped keep Thor reinforced together. Brunnhilde was another whom he felt deep gratitude for as well, her persistent visitings helped ground Thor and pull him out from his misery, and she also kept him up to date on the happenings of New Asgard. What was unexpected although very much appreciated, was the arrival of Hulk and the rabbit. From there, Thor was convinced to join this small band of characters back to the Avengers Headquarters where he would reunite with past teammates. After that, Thor was frequented less and less by dreams and nightmares, only sharing dreamless and bleak sleeps as he frequented alcohol less and less for his time only now consisted of planning and executing.

They won, of course. The Avengers were a formidable team who were backed by warriors and fighters from everywhere, they stood strong and glorious and in the end, successfully defeat the man that sought out ruin beyond all the realms. Their success didn't come without loses though, Natasha and Tony, and all the lives lost during that battle were all courageous heroes in whom all deserved songs of their valorous deeds in the face of death itself. They would all be remembered and never forgotten, and may they all find peace and rest in Valhalla.

Thor, knowing it to be a wise decision, handing over leadership of New Asgard to Brunnhilde, for she had practically already led the small village to prosperity and the people needed someone that they could rely on, and Thor knew that wasn't him. Instead, Thor joined the Asgardians of the Galaxy, or Guardians of the Galaxy, whichever you preferred to say. Here, Thor grew even more among the mad bunch of misfits and truly found support between their familiar banter and bickering.

 

Thor would miss Loki everyday, despite all the latter's faults and mistakes. He would miss Loki's smirk, his unattainable knowledge, the way they could bounce off each other as they conversed, his affinity for seidr; he would even miss some of the insults and words Loki would call him for he knew Loki never truly meant half of them, and because all of these quirks and qualities made up the character Loki was. Although gone, Loki was with Thor everyday. Unbeknownst to the God of Thunder, Loki had engraved a serpent into his grand axe, as well as inscribing his Nordic name below. Thor may never notice it, or eventually will, however it won't take away Loki from being by his brother's side, never mind what alternate universe he may find himself in. He will always remain by Thor's side.


	2. Asgardians of The Galaxy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i actually wrote the odinson bro's hug this time. i wrote a fix it for my fix it.

**ABOARD THE MILANO**

**FT THE ASGARDIANS OF THE GALAXY**

 

Life on the Guardian ship was, _refreshing_.

The leader, Quail-apologies, Peter _Quill_ , was a man no short of pop culture references that although no one quite understood, they smiled at anyway. His childlike character reminded Thor of past friends, and his taste in music was an inquired taste that Thor saw himself become quickly adorned towards. What Thor could see was that Peter longed for someone. Gamora, Mantis a person he remembered from their past gathering had summarised to a single name. The green lady, or the zen-whoberis Thor's mind supplied, daughter of Thanos. Thor could only think Peter lucky however, he had a second chance at starting all over with the person he loved the most. Although, being from an alternate reality, this new Gamora didn't share the same feelings as old Gamora, and acted distant to Quill when they met on the battlefield. This surged the principle plan of finding new Gamora as she had quickly dispersed from the fight alone when it was over, much to the Guardians dismay.

Thor didn't have any complaint with this plan, as he wanted his friend-and yes, he would consider Peter his friend despite all of the pissing contests they always seem to have, to find happiness after the heartache everyone has gone through. Rocket, despite his hard exterior and crude attitude, was truly a softie on the inside, a side of the rabbit that Thor had seen numerous times demonstrated towards the flora colossus or the tree whenever he thought no one else was looking. Thor saw Mantis as the central being of the word, empathy. She often took Thor's grief away when times it became too much, which he was grateful for. Her naivety to the world around her was novel to Thor, and her desire to understand and experience new things helped ease away the pain of lost. He greatly enjoyed Mantis' company for she looked at the universe through childlike eyes; wide and eager to drink everything in and this helped Thor see that although he had seen much ruin in the past, there was still beauty awaiting for him to find. Drax, well, he was an interesting one. His love for his gone family was prominent, a love Thor could associate with. Although, it was his inability to understand when words were meant as metaphors and not to be taken seriously, which Thor found amusing and made him feel light again. The tree was a teenager-almost enough said there. The rolling of the eyes, the stubbornness and the irritated words, which consisted solely of 'I' and 'am' and 'Groot', he often mumbled under his breath reminded Thor fondly of his younger brother.

Thor was glad he embarked on this adventure, this new chapter in his life with the Guardians of the Galaxy, for he didn't know what he would do without this new band of misfits. 

He did miss New Asgard, he sometimes got slightly homesick, but he was also glad that he was gone for most of his time there was of him during the darkest and lowest point of his life. He cared little for anything anymore and let himself go, allowing himself to lavish away with food and alcohol to drown everything else out. He knew New Asgard deserved, and this better was with the leadership of Brunnhilde who had already done an astouding effort already at steering New Asgard to prosperity and growth. Making her ruler of New Asgard was one of the most benefitting decisions he had made in a long while, and he was enthusiastic to return one day to oversee the development under the Valkyrie's hopeful rule.

 

Now, he sat in the more open part of the ship, playing a fascinating game with Gamora. She told him that the Ironman had shown her this game when they were together.

"Your fingers are the goals, just like that. And now, I have to flick this object between them. If I get it, I receive a point. Then, you get a go." Simple enough  and pleasantly enjoyable. They would play until time didn't matter for to Thor, it was something he could carry on from Tony, a brave man and a dear friend, and how he missed him so. Also, Nebula had taking a liking to the game as more times than not, she would come out victorious. It would make Thor happy to see Nebula be joyful when she won, although it was barely perceivable through her stoic face. She also made sure that they shook hands after each game, 'fair game' she would say. Currently, Thor was losing, one to two. 

With a fluid flick of her fingers, the object flew neatly through Thor's posts. "Yes! I have won this game." Nebula had stood up in her celebration, shocked at yet another success of hers.

"Indeed you have my friend. I congratulate you so." As usual, the pair shook hands, finalising another game and adding yet another point to Nebula's winning streak.

Rocket stared with disdain at the pair before you. "Ya know Thor, I'd suggest some exercise instead of these little games you've been playing a lot recently. Try and lose some of that fifty pounds of fat you've gained there."

Thor shook his head, a playful smile on his face as he looked towards the small fur ball, "That's alight rabbit. It's simply mass, my friend."

"It's fat." Rocket bluntly shot back, tinkering with yet another object of his.

Thor let out a laugh nonchalantly as he insisted. "It's muscle."

"Lets all just be clear here, it's fat." Rocket's voice rang out loudly, waving a tool of his around carelessly.

"It's fat, man." Quill spoke, walking into the main area, his long coat moving swiftly behind him. Thor had the decency to look offended, his mouth opened slightly as he stared around.

 

"Everyone leave the God-man alone. His curves are greatly desired back on my home planet. Many would fight for an honour to lay beside such a specimen like yourself in bed." Drax's support of Thor's appearance caused Peter Quill's face to scrunch up in disgust while Rocket echoed a quiet 'gross'. Thor's eyebrows raised as if to see 'you see' and he nodded appreciatively in Drax's direction where he received an understanding nod back. 

"Listening to you all speak will be the death of me." Nebula grumbled out, frowning as Rocket threw a spare screw at her which she easily dodged.

"Alright ladies." Peter clapped his hands, gaining everyone's attention. "We are approaching the next jump cut. I repeat, approaching the next jump cut. Now that everyone has heard and understood the words 'approaching' and 'jump cut', there can be no room for argument if-let's just give a random example, oh _yes_ , someone's card tower topples over, you cannot complain about it and _definitely_ no threatening one another with knives this time." Peter's exasperation greatly amused Thor.

The distant huff of Drax could be heard by everyone. "Moving on. Movie night tonight for those who want to. This kid called Peter on earth supplied me with a few movies before we left after telling me to catch up on my pop culture, and I think I'm going to go with the Back to the Future trilogy. Any objections, don't even bother saying because that's what we're going to watch." Peter paused, scratching his head as if trying to remember something, "that's all I guess. Oh! Actually, could someone please monitor how long Groot is spending on that game of his, it's gonna rot his brain dead, I swear."

"I am Groot."

A chorus of 'woahs!' filled the ship as Thor choked and spluttered over his drink as Rocket stopped his tinkering and placed his hands on his hips, looking every ounce unimpressed as he stared pointedly at Peter, "he definitely didn't hear that from me."

"That was not a nice word." Mantis chimed in, her eyes wide as she covered her ears with her hands, looking out at everyone.

"That deserves a time-out buddy, no game time for the rest of the trip." Peter walked over and took the game out of Groot's hands much to his displeasure and to his incoherent grumbling. Quill shook his head in discontent, mumbling out in exasperation, "teenagers."

 

Nebula didn't react alongside the group as her focus was on the barely noticeable shaking of a couple of jars that resided on one of the shelves. It didn't seem to be much, perhaps a broken screw, but as the shaking grew more and more, it became something that was to be worried off. Taking long strides forward, she felt the shelve, feeling it's strong vibration that were growing. "Quill." She spoke firmly, catching everyone's attention as she turned around.

Being shaken from their conversation made everyone more aware of what was happening. The shaking quickly evolved to the entirety of the space craft, miscellaneous objects from everywhere falling to the floor as panic arose. "What the hell's going on?" Peter cried out, grasping for something to hold onto as the vibrations greatly unsteadied everyone's footing. No one could then explain the small blue dot that suddenly appeared in the middle of the open area, gradually growing bigger and brighter within quick succession. "Now what the hell is that thing?"

"Throw something at it!" Someone shouted out in desperation as the blue thing grew larger in size, dark wisps outlining it. "Don't be stupid, you don't know what'll happen afterwards!" Someone else shouted back. But it was too late. Drax had opted to throwing one of his knives at the blue mist. Bracing himself, Thor expected an explosion, or the knife reflecting off the blueness, but no. The knife disappeared as it touched the mist, however this caused it to glow brighter with more ferocity. 

"Shit!" Thor yelled out, shielding his eyes as the light became too much, it's azure glow blinding anyone who dared looked. It quickly swallowed the entirety of inside the ship, blue light pulsing everywhere. And then-

The shaking stopped. It all went quiet save the laborious breaths of the Guardians. Thor, with caution, tentatively opened his eyes and quickly checked everyone. He called out, "is everyone alright?" There was no response. Instead, as his vision cleared he watched as Peter drew his weapon out, aiming it forward. "Who the hell are you and what do you want?" He demanded.

 

Thor turned his head and saw a man. A man he immediately recognised.

There stood Loki.

Thor froze, his grip from the table began slack as he stared forward in shock. This wasn't happening. This couldn't be happening. _How_ was this happening? But it was. And there Loki stood, adorning his favoured greens and golds, tesseract in hand. He wasn't all that surprised seeing that gem in Loki's possession-it made sense of what had happened mere moments ago. And still, Thor stared into the eyes of his brother, immobilised. He's supposed to be _dead_. He watched him die.

Why? This-no, this couldn't be. How?

"Impossible." No, this was not happening, this couldn't be real. It couldn't be. It was simply a façade, _yes_ , only a front-a charade of some sort, an absurd joke on Thor's expense that would make people bellow out in laughter at his pained reaction. He hadn't been sleeping well recently, to honestly speak he hadn't been sleeping well for a long time now, but that must be the reason why and it was just his mind playing a farce on him. Insomnia-that's what you called it, Thor recalled Bruce saying, it would create disillusions and false realities that you would believe to be real. This was not unlike before when he drank himself into a pit and would have imagings of his family and of his once home. It's not real, no. Perhaps Loki had faked his death again on that fateful day on the Statesman, and Thor was once again gullible enough to fall for his brother's trick.

No. Thor dismissed that thought as soon as it came. His death looked and felt too real that day. How Loki could have faked that, Thor didn't know how and believed it not to be. Loki wouldn't have made him go through another death of his, just for it be unreal, no, not again. They had reconciled, as brothers and as friends. Time spent on the Statesman with the Asgardian Refugees in such close proximity had brought them closer together in such a long time; they had good times and bad times, they often argued over minuscule things similar to times when they were such boys. They were more honest with each other, especially with the lost of their home and family so few years in between, they talked more on how they felt-admittedly, more Thor than Loki, but in the end they both became an anchor for one another. They keep each other strong.

Loki revealed the entire pantomime that was the 2012 New York invasion. Thor listened and didn't speak. He listened to Loki explain where he ended up in result of his jump of the Bifrost-no, he _let_ go. Such a difference alluded Thor to Loki's mentality during his banishment, a prime example of when Loki needed him the most yet he wasn't there. Thor became more understanding; finding out you were an enemy specie of your home would have been terrifying, and then having to act as regent as your father or not-father fell into the Odinsleep with no such support would have been panicking. Thor felt guilt as he listened intently yet allowed his brother to continue, offering a commiserating hand that Loki didn't hesitate to take felt just enough. Loki was quick to bypass the happenings of where he found himself to be after the fall and concluded to being found and taken to a leader. He only spoke of their moniker, the Mad Titan with sparse words, saying he had enough conviction to see out his plans for the universe. Thor could see that this titan terrified Loki, and he struggled to calm the seething storm brewing inside of him.

Loki didn't say he was mind controlled like the Clint or Erik Selvig were although he admitted that there was an element of it present. Instead, Loki said he was coerced through the amplification of negative emotions such as wraith and envy and that he was manipulated to believe false memories that made it easier for the second son of Odin to fall inline as a soldier under the control of Thanos. His failed invasion was planned, Loki said. It made sense; Loki was a strategist, had an intelligent mind, was cunning and could execute plans discretely without anyone noticing. Yet, his invasion was loud, chaotic, Loki had monologued the entirety of his plan and had spelled out his next steps to the Avengers without a care. He was convert, he put himself out for everyone to see, he made his capture too easy. Thor felt ashamed that he didn't see through the stupidity of the plan, the words from Loki which greatly opposed the words spoken a year ago of never wanting the throne, Thor as his brother of a thousand years should've realised that there was more going on than he realised. Yet he didn't.

Loki didn't allow him to feel shame for he told Thor that he 'shouldn't waste his time wanting to change his past actions for they had already taken place and set in stone'. It didn't however make Thor feel any less but he nodded his head anyway. 

He didn't believe he would ever see Loki again. Not after Thanos. Especially not after Thanos. Yet here he was. Standing in front of Thor. Alive. Breathing. _How?_

"I'm here, Thor."

Just hearing his name fall from Loki's tongue caused Thor to begin to cry. He didn't realise he was doing it, not registering the tears that leaked down his cheeks or the way his vision blurred slightly among the edges. His chest begin to heave and breathing became a harder action to do, his head pounded heavily, his pulse echoed loudly in his ears.

But Loki was here. Alive in front of him. His brother. Here.

 

His limbs weighed tonnes as he stood to his feet. It was a struggle to drag his limbs across the mere metres that separated him from Loki, yet it felt like miles. But then, there he finally stood in front of his brother, his _breathing_ brother. Thor couldn't believe it. He was terrified. He took himself back to the many imagings he had of Loki during his drunken days, of how whenever Thor would reach out, Loki would disappear. Thor didn't want that to happen again, didn't want this to be another false, hopeless dream of his. But the rest of the Guardians can see Loki, they were all on guard at the sight of the mystery man. It must be real then. It must be.

Thor reached out his hand. All this long while, Loki just watched Thor, watched his every move with careful eyes, expecting something, anything. Thor didn't say a word as his hand neared Loki's shoulder. His whole world seemed to collapse when his hand touched solid muscle. Thor was quick in pulling Loki forward, resting his head against his little brother's shoulder as he wept quietly, being able to finally have their hug. Thor had never felt more at home than in his brother's arms in such a long time, it was overwhelming yet what he needed the most at the same time. Loki was still for a few moments, arms stiffly at his sides until he apprehensively brought his arms up and wrapping them around his brother. Thor couldn't stop a sob at this point, wrapping his arms the slightest bit tighter around Loki's waist when he began to shush softly in Thor's ear.

"It's alright Thor. You need not cry, I'm here. Okay? I'm here." Loki's voice was soothing, free of any bitterness or wraith, it eased the worries from Thor and any tribulations or problems he would soon have to face mattered not for his brother was here, in his arms. Just the hearing of Loki speak again after so long, _too long_ , made him cry just that bit harder.

 

"Guys, I don't know if we should interrupt or let this go on for a while longer." Rocket's horribly whispered words caused Thor to laugh loudly, his body shaking as he felt incredulous. He couldn't believe that this was actually happening.

Lifting his head up off his brother's shoulder, Thor stared at Loki with glistening eyes as he clasped the back of Loki's neck, an endearment they had long shared since they were children. "I've missed you so much, brother." Thor's words were heavy with emotion, his heart feeling light with happiness surging around his body. Leaning forward and closing his eyes, Thor rested his forward against his brother's, whispering dearly, "I can't believe you're here." Silence overtook the two brothers as Thor relished in the warm breath from Loki upon his face and the feeling of his arms warped tightly around him. Thor hadn't felt such euphoria in such a long time.

"Yeah, Thor- _buddy_ , would you mind telling us who your friend is? You know, the one that almost blinded us with his teleportation here." The voice came from Peter who had lowered his weapon the moment Thor had his arms wrapped around the black haired stranger.

A wide smile, full of mirth blossomed on his face as he stepped back to face the Guardians yet not removing his arm which was securely placed around Loki's waist. "Apologies my friends! Of course, well, this is my brother Loki; second son of Odin and a prince of Asgard. I have long thought him gone yet I never lost hope of him returning to me, and here he is, finally." Thor beamed his smile towards Loki, who seemed quite startled at how delicately Thor stared at him and of how much brotherly love in which shone in his eyes. With a wave of his other am, Thor then began to introduce the six in front of them, "Loki, I would like for you to meet the Guardians of the Galaxy. There's Nebula, Rocket, Mantis, Drax, Groot, and finally their leader, Peter Quill. These people before you helped me when I once believed I had nothing. I owe a lot to these people and will forever be grateful for them allowing me to join their team and being able to travel with them this past while." 

Staring over at the team, Loki didn't see much. It was a mismatched bunch that somehow worked together. Nebula and Drax seemed imposing with their intimidating figures but Loki could tell they wanted no fight, his gaze didn't care much for the waving antennae woman and the leader, Peter Quill surprised Loki slightly as he could tell he was Migardian, and how he had ended up in space was beyond Loki. What did cause Loki to raise his eyebrow in slight bewilderment was Groot and Rocket. But he didn't even try to pay that headache thought any heed because _of course_ Thor had befriended a tree and a rabbit out of everything. 

 

"It's a pleasure to meet such cherished friends of my brother." Loki kindly spoke, resulting in his side getting squeezed from an appreciative Thor.

"Alright, fancy pants." The furred creature declared loudly, much to the slight amusement of Loki, "so, do wanna tell us what you've got our pirate-angel here so emotional about? And why you showed up on our ship now, making a grand mess of things?"

Loki could feel Thor's intense stare on him and he was sure that he had a multitude of questions swarming that mind of his. "Of course, but I believe it best if we sit for this will not be short."

Everyone had taken their seats within a moment's breath and stared expectantly at Loki. Loki then turned to his brother and spoke firmly knowing what he had to say would be dealt with a measure of difficulty, "Thor, I need you to know and understand that I am not the Loki you truly know and love." Thor's look of protest was evident and easily expectant. "What I mean to say is that I'm not the Loki from your timeline, Thor. Well, I was originally until up to 2012 in New York, however, I've come to understand that your Avengers had done the almost impossible, which was time travel. And because of the Avengers going back in time, this helped disrupt the original timeline that I belonged to and therefore created a different timeline altogether. _Anyway_ , things happened and when the tesseract landed oh so easily at my feet, due to my decision of using this as an opportunity to escape, I therefore began forward in a new timeline forged, an alternate universe if you may. Different universe but almost the same."

Loki knew Thor to be a slow learner yet he seemed to understand what Loki was trying to explain fair enough. And so Loki continued. "To think of your universe being the sole universe would be blatantly ignorant as there is such thing as the multiverse, a hypothetical group of alternate universes that comprise everything in existence. In this includes parallel universes and in these co-existing realities is where I've been. And, well, for why I've arrived here _now_ is because I finally found the correct universe I originally belonged to." Loki could feel the strong grip of Thor grabbing his hand, holding it vehemently as the words made more sense to him.

Quirking a brow, Loki spoke to Thor, "you know, I've been to universes where we never were brothers-" "Sounds awful." Loki couldn't stop his smile at Thor's comment, "perhaps to us but it's indifferent to them. I found myself in universes where Odin never took me from the temple during that battle and instead I grew up a prince of Jotunheimr, others where I was instead a long term friend of Odin's and was even your uncle. And more where I had bore many children that were dear to me. It was truly incredible." Thor admired the wistful look in Loki's eyes, for it was a long while since he had seen it last.

"Then why come back to this universe? What's so great about this one?" The leader, Peter Quill had asked curiously.

Loki pondered for a bit but the answer he already knew. "Many universes I have been to, and yet, this is the universe that I am least satisfied with, especially with the way my life ends. Having the power to explore many universes means I can see where I went wrong, what wrong pathways I took. And I can only try to learn from my mistakes and better myself in future universes to come, to truly explore my potential and become a fulfilled person that I would be proud of."

Thor felt like crying all again at that moment. All he ever wanted was Loki to realise his potential and to become the best version of himself and hearing Loki admit that himself, filled Thor with immense joy. Looking over at Loki with soft eyes, Thor was untroubled and finally content for his brother was back, alive. Catching Thor's stare, Loki gave him a nod and a smile, a smile that had frequented less and less on Loki's face years ago and a smile that Thor missed greatly. With this new comfort found, Thor saw himself finally relax after these many years of pain and grief, by his brother's side, hands heavy in each other's. And here, Thor felt at peace again.

 

 

**COUPLE OF HOURS LATER**

 

Stillness had dawned over the spacecraft as the Guardians had decided it was time for bed and had all retired to their beds for the night, leaving the two brothers to their own devices for a while, for as long as they wanted as time didn't seem to matter no more, especially with Loki's possession of the tesseract. Thor was deeply thankful for Quill's although unsubtle cue that suddenly found all of the Guardians too tired for any more movies, for it allowed him time alone with Loki, his brother, although from another universe, his brother all-the-same that he missed greatly these many past years. Silence occupied the two brothers as they mindlessly watch another film, lost in their own thoughts, but neither minded as simply being present in each other's presences was enough; no word needed to be spoken every moment spent together as something as small as the constant reminder of the sound of each other breathing felt just.

Thor seemed to be thinking of every little and large thing. His mind bustled with memories he both cherished and loathed, and of words he equally regretted and meant entirely. Tossing an apple in his hand brought back a memory fore front in his mind. It was one of when Thor and Loki were children immediately bringing a nostalgic smile to Thor's face as he chuckled fondly. This catch the attention of Loki who raised that one brow expectantly, awaiting an explanation Thor was happy to give. "I merely give remembrance to back when we were just childs, when we were both at the heights of our mischiefs and when we got pofusely told off on numerous occasions." Loki smiled at this, many situations coming to mind as he rested back easily into his chair, "well, do entail."

"I was thinking back to when you were able to convince me to steal Idunn's apple. How gullible I was-" Loki cut Thor off with a shake of his head. "How gullible indeed. And how easy it was to convince you to retrieve the finest fruits which just so happened to be highest branched apples."

"You manipulated unfairly." Thor protested weakly, a smile on his face as he recalled the events.

Loki scoffed at this, looking over at Thor in distain, "you were more than enthusiastic to comply. Oh, how eager you were to climb to the very top."

"Aye, and you knew I was a terrible climber as well." Loki laughed deeply at his, the drink he had been nursing had loosened his usual tense posture to  give way to a relaxed and contented self. His voice sounded of joy when he spoke, "you were absolutely horrible, worst of worst."

"Alright, I was inexperienced back then. And of course, I fell. Broke my arm-" "Mother was furious." Loki added with a small smile.

Thor then looked down at his glass, watching the liquid pool together as he swirled it around slowly. He stayed quiet for a few moments as he remembered that day. Of how his foot slipped and he crashing down to the floor, landing awkwardly on his arm. He remembered Loki's frantic movements as panic seeped upon his young face, having watch him run away to retrieve mother. What he could never forget was Frigga's frenzied expression upon finding her son, taking him to the healers within quick succession, which then was where she demanded answers from her sons. They both lied of course although it didn't work out as Frigga had asked them separately and both gave different answers. Thor recalled saying he sparred Loki and lost whereas Loki had said that Thor had tripped over his own clumsy feet. They both recieved extra work for attempting to steal and Idunn's apple and a scolding for their uncoordinated attempt at a lie. They were always getting into trouble when they were younger and forever got told off by their mother. "I miss her." Thor then admitted quietly.

Loki stayed silent for a couple of moments, the only sound Thor could concur were of his steady breaths in and out. He broke the silence when he raised his glass to the sky, speaking softly, "may her soul rest peacefully among her beloveds in Valhalla."

Thor nodded solemnly as he too raised his glass, "aye to that."

 

A tranquil atmosphere found the brothers once more as they rested, arms touching as they sat close together. Now thinking of his mother sorrowed Thor, for she was truly the finest woman in his life and he desired no less than to find himself in her arms again as though he was a child. Attempting to lighten to mind, Thor spoke. "Multiverse, huh? Is there any possibility that this is the universe that I lose the most in?" His words held no charm and Loki could easily detect underlining of bitterness in there. And it was completely understandable; Thor has lost almost everything at least some point or another in the past ten years or so that Loki could only admire how strong Thor managed to stay through those dark times. 

Taking another sip of the drink he conjured himself, he replied, "it appears unfortunately so, big brother." Thor then chuckled unamused at this, eventually taking a long gulp of his own drink to commiserate his hard times with.

Bridled with courage from the drink, Loki caught Thor's attention, ensured that his older brother was focused and began to speak, "Thor, I want you to know how sorry I am for all of the pain I've put you through in this universe. The many times I've caused you to mourn and grieve when you truly are the least who deserves it." The earnest way Loki spoke caused Thor to straighten up more, his mouth opening to refuse Loki of these words as they felt stiff coming from his mouth, "Loki-" He begin to say.

However, Loki cut him off. " _Please_ , Thor. Just, I have to say these words. I need for you to know." Loki waited tensely for Thor's reply, his eyes wide in slight desperation, with the words at the tip of his tongue. Thor could see how much of what Loki wanted to say meant to him, how badly he wanted Thor to hear them however strange he would feel saying them. And so, Thor nodded his head, allowing his brother to continue much to his gratitude. "Again and again have I wronged you, insulted you, hurt you the deepest, yet still you come back to me. Yet still you love me with your wholeheartedness and never loss hope. I just wanted you to know for all of those times when I felt envious of you, angry or frustrated at you, my love never waned. I know you deserve better, Thor, so now I can only hope that you will accept me again, for I promise that I will do better for the both of us."

Loki finished off in one breath, nervousness prickling at his skin as he stared uncertainly at his older brother. Thor stared back as he allowed the words to wash over him. A soft smile pulled at his lips when he spoke, "so, you are saying that you will stay?" Hope blossomed within Thor as he watched Loki, his brother who once denied all relation to him, his brother in which he had both fought against and alongside, and his brother in who he was gifted a second chance with.

"Wherever you are, I shall be. If you'll have me of course."

Sincerity poured from Thor in floods as he mumbled an 'O Loki', pulling his brother forward close to him in another hug. His arms wrapped tightly around his little brother as he spoke assuredly in his ear, "of course I'll have of you, you fool. You're my brother. I love you too dearly to ever want to let you go." And that was enough for Loki. That was what he wanted to hear to assure his stay beside his brother's side. And he wasn't going to be going anywhere anytime soone for he was back where he belonged and longed to be the most.

 

After a quiet moment, Loki spoke Thor's name who then hummed in an reply. As innocently as Loki could possibly sound, he spoke, "I wasn't going to mention it in the beginning but as we've spoken more and experienced such nostalgia together, recalling fond memories from when we were children, even laughed over a drink together. I believe it to be in your best interests to listen carefully to what I have to say, and to take it with as little offense as you can for I truly mean you no harm and-"

"Do spit it out, Loki." Thor spoke out in exasperation, moving back out from the hug, his expression unimpressed as he stared at his brother expectantly. Loki lived for the easily pinpointed resignation only he could create, found in those blue eyes of Thor's.

"You've gotten fat."

Thor, to his own credit, remained stoic for a single moment, before groaning irritably, pushing Loki's face away much to his delight and to Thor's annoyance. Oh how he never truly missed these rarities of Loki.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbh i rr do not like the ending of this part, although i cant be doing anymore writing for a while because my gcses are in two weeks and ive fcked myself royally over by having done no revision. i don't care much though as all of my attention recently as been on endgame and game of thrones. may we all pray for those at winterfell for tomorrow night for the dead have arrived however, i will not hesitate to battle the whitewalker king himself if Jaime, or Brienne or the hound get killed


	3. Alliance of Hela and Loki

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hela and Loki join the battle against Thanos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is part one of a oneshot that I began to write because Loki deserves better (pretty mad at the Russo's for writing his character out like that) and we all deserve to see Thor, Loki and Hela fight as a family, combining their powers together as they take down grimace. 
> 
> Also, I love you all 3000 for your such kind words as they really mean a lot.

**ONE SHOT INVOLVING LOKI AND HELA JOINING THE BATTLE AGAINST THANOS**

 

Thor didn't want to get out of bed.

He didn't want to do anything, really. He didn't feel like doing anything. He just wanted to lay there on his back on the too small of a bed and do nothing. Feel nothing.

Thor didn't care. He didn't care about much recently. He didn't care for the state of his house anymore; plates were quickly piling up, worn clothes were being left discarded on the floor, he couldn't remember the last time he had cleaned. He didn't care much for himself either; after five years, his hair had grown out again to a disheveled mess in which he'd loosely tie back at times, his beard had become unruly and overgrown due to a lack of concern, he had a notable weight gain as well.

He didn't care to train anymore as he didn't feel the eagerness or drive for it. Thor couldn't even remember the last time he had held Stormbreaker-his mind had become blurred recent months back due to excessive drinking that it was hard to decipher much anymore. It wasn't long after the snap that he had taken to drinking. He knew it wasn't healthy, if that wasn't already evident in his changed appearance, and expecially pairing that with an absence of exercise, yet Thor couldn't bring himself to care.

He pretended to care however, in front of his friends Korg and Miek whenever they would come around to where he resided. He would put on a wide smile that was expected of him and would act characteristically like the old Thor, exuberant and loud. Admittedly, he drank during most of these visits, thankfully, he was forever the gleeful drunk, although he had dimmed in recent years, and had found that he didn't have to try at all to hold his charade.

When they would leave as the night had grown dark, Thor would find himself alone again. And he loathed it. What he did feel besides from the bleak dullness that had captured his mind for a year now was hatred for the quietness. It was never quiet in his home, his _real_ home of Asgard. The kingdom had always swarmed with bustling maids and it's citizens, noises echoing of clinking armours and swords, servants frantically manuvering around the palace, Thor himself striding the golden halls gaily with his dearest friends; from morn to noon to the night, someone would always be awake making the slightest of noises. The Avengers Headquarters was similar. Whenever Thor was present, there'd always be something whether that be Tony blasting his rock music into the early hours as he engineered, or the sounds of Natasha and Bruce conversing over every little thing, or when everyone came together to have dinner, it'd never be quiet. The Statesman was alike in many ways also; it's close confinements meant there were little to no place in which the sound could disappear away to, the Asgardian refugees would always speak to one another to cease worries and to calm nerves, and even the low rumble of the ship's engines forever disrupted the stillness. Now Thor missed the constant noise, the distraction that was always there that Thor used to simply ignore. He wanted it back, especially now in the miserable night.

O, how Thor hated the silence, now more than ever.

 

 

 

 **AMIDST ONE OF THE NINE REALMS** ****

Loki awoke to silence.

He felt, strange-well, as strange as one would feel after awaking from death. He felt light, weightless and revived. Breathing came easy to him as though his windpipe hadn't ever been crushed and neck never snapped. He never felt this relaxed in recent years, yet he was dead. It was final, and by the Mad Titan of all people. How he wished he didn't go out the way he did; surrounding the mere dozens of slaughtered Asgardian refugees, aside the corpse of Heimdall, by the man who promised him pain beyond measure, and in front of his brother who could have done little more than watch. _Thor_ , Loki could only think helplessly, for he had abandoned him once again, would have him grieve once more and be lost all by himself.

But Loki's death had to have taken place. A sacrifice of sorts, for Thanos wouldn't have left the refugee ship without restoring balance in the universe and that meant only one prince could have survived, and so Loki solely decided that it had to be him. Thor can shout at him later for his recklessness but Loki wouldn't care for he didn't regret the decision he made that day. He died without an ounce of hesitation so his brother would survive. Loki died for Thor.

He opened his eyes to a desolate nothingness, the unremarkable greyness of the sky quickly raised suspicions of the place where Loki found himself to. Feeling the surface he laid upon with his hands, he found it was a gravelled ground, isolated of any living plant or life itself. There was no need in guessing what environment Loki found himself to be in for it was the swift movement of a sword, barely detectable by sound which confirmed Loki's thoughts. With resignation, Loki couldn't suppress his groan as his gaze turned upright, focusing on the person who stood before his floored body, their weapon pointed warningly at his neck. _The_ _Norns_ _be damned,_ he could only think bitterly, his body tensing unconsciously as he met her stare. Distastefully, he spoke,"I must truly be in hel if you're here."

Her sneer was expected. "How soon, _little brother_ , have you graced my realm with your presence. Although, I'm not the least bit shocked for I didn't expect much from the lesser son of Odin." What little satisfaction Loki would derive from being on this barren realm would come solely off his sister's grotesque appearance. Her skin had been burned off viciously in some areas, exposing hidden bone while the smell of burning skin suffocated the air around her. Half of her face was charred off much to Loki's delight with her clothes in equal ruin. _She wasn't healing_ , Loki thought. The heart of Asgard supplied her with copious amounts of power, yet with it now destroyed, Hela was left advantageously weakened.

Loki's eyes narrowed, his calm state forgotten about quickly. His voice stay controlled yet his body seethed. If it wasn't for her then he'd still have a home and most of Asgard's people would still live. _That murderous bitch_. "Ah, _sister dearest_ , do forgive me when I say that your words reflect harshly on yourself for you came back for-to be generous is to say at most three days. And yet, within quick succession had my brother and I caused your demise." Spitefully, Loki leaned forward, a wicked glint to his eye as he allowed the sharp blade to prick his neck as he spoke with the fury in which accumulated over the dreary weeks spent on the Statesman, acquiring a list of all those who fell beneath his sister's blade. "I pray that you agonisingly felt the scorching flames in which crisped your body. I hope you begged as you suffered rightfully and did experience the fiery scorn of all those in whom you took the life from, lady death, for you deserve no less. "

Leaning back, Loki noticed his breathing hardened as his wraith poured out of him in waves. He clenched his fists painfully, attempting to control his anger in the face of his sister. It was hard however, when a smirk formed on her face. "There's no doubt that you are a son of Odin, little princeling. You demonstrate his anger perfectly."

Loki huffed, irritated by this. "I may have been raised by that senile man, however I am not his true kin. I can only be thankful for that however, as it means I share no drop of blood relation to you. O, how I pity Thor dearly."

Finally, Hela moved her weapon away as the tension loosened slightly, allowing Loki to sit up rather unceremoniously. Studying Loki intently, Hela tilted her head and spoke in her melodic drawl, "you sure do look like me, though."

Loki rolled his eyes at this and spoke as distastefully as he could, "and what a pleasantry that is." Narrowed eyes stared the other down, competing to see who would break first. After a moment, Hela relented, rolling her eyes in annoyance as she turned swiftly away, her half scorched cape following her gracefully. Loki only watched on as she made around ten steps before stopping, glancing over shoulder.

"I'll have you meet me in the throne room at sunrise. Hear that as a _demand_ , Odinson and not an _ask_. We have pressing matters to talk about and I'm afraid, little time left." Loki stood to his feet, shoulders straight as he faced his sister. "Why not now, Hela? It's not as though I have much to do on this barren realm."

What he received in return was that recognisable manic smirk of hers, the glint in her eyes worrying as she quickly shifted her hand. A midnight blade was produced out of nothing before Loki could even comprehend the slightest twitch of her fingers, the weapon impaling Loki straight through the chest. Loki fell to his knees as blood coughed up his throat, causing him to splutter it out gruesomely. His eyes were slightly widened in shock as he looked at Hela, himself clutching to the blade helplessly.

"Do not worry brother, you'll heal eventually. What is dead may never truly die on this finite realm, and you will come back soon." And with that, she strode away, leaving Loki behind to bleed sluggishly to his death, his clothes stained a crimson red as the last words he incoherently muttered were venomous curses directed towards his cunt of a sister.

 

 

 

**THE MORN AFTER**

 

"You are such a cunt, you know that, right?" Loki furiously strode into the throne room, his cape whipping sharply in the wind he created with his long strides behind him, his jaw and fists clenched tight as he tried to refrain himself from lashing out, although his patience at the very moment was sharp razor thin and the slightest inconvenience could set him off. He felt similar to Thor in his older brother's brass years when his temperament was embarrassingly volatile at most times. Loki stood paces from where Hela lounged on her throne casually, although Loki knew better that she could summon another one of those blades within a split moment's thought.

"I do admit it was rather satisfying to see you gurgle up your own blood. Mayhaps, I kill you again however this time, I will draw it out, decapitate limb by limb as though I were a butcher. Now that would be exciting, indeed." Her deranged smile was present once again as she stared her brother down yet Loki didn't recoil in fear. His opened his frees and began to speak freely.

"You demanded for my audience and so here I am. I pray not we waste time with our idle chats as much as I do adore them. You did say you had pressing matters to speak of and as you can see, my ear is open." Imagining that this was going to take long, Loki took his place to the floor, sitting cross-legged comfortably as he raised a brow expectantly.

Thankfully, Hela didn't squander time no longer. "Before all, I must summarise how time works on this realm if you don't already know." Loki waited. "As death is nothingness, so is time on this realm. The sun will rise in the morn and set at nigh, yes but we cannot accurately measure the rate that times passes. We can only guess. Why this is so, I do not. And so, moving on importantly. As we speak, a beast known as the Mad Titan is acquiring the most powerful artefacts among and beyond the nine realms. He does so to penultimately snap-"

"To snap his fingers, and to cease existence of half of all living population, restoring balance everywhere." Loki finished off, his hands beginning to shake slightly at the mention of the mad man, and so he quickly placed them behind his back. "I know of Thanos and his plans. And attempting to stop him now appears fruitless. He has already gained two of the infinity stones, space and power, making him the most powerful being in the universe. Possibly, he has already required all of them and will fulfil his supposed destiny after all. All we can do now is wait. It's not as though we can do much more than that." Hela didn't reply, her expression was focused as she thought hard on something. Loki broke her chain of thought when he spoke, "why do you care anyway. Many will die and will reside here in Hel, practically gifting you with an impressively large arm at your heel."

Hela shook her head, looking up. Her expression was tinging on exhaustion as she spoke. "Half of all living population to restore balance. Trillions of the dead would flood this realm too quickly, chaos would evitably erupt within days and disrupt the normalcy affirmed here already. Blood and ruin would become of this realm for Hel is destined for those wrong and corrupted by sin. Although, mayhaps I would like to keep my rule on this realm at the least and not watch it befall to a man hellbent on collapsing the world."

Loki stared at Hela. Being the ruler of any realm was tiring, so it seemed by Hela's slight slumped position on the throne, despite her best to hide it. Loki thought and thought some more before he realised something. Why else would Hela call him here if she didn't need something? He then scoffed loudly, disbelief causing him to laugh. "You need my help, don't you?" She only stared intently back. "I hope you do not because you must be disillusioned if you even believe I'd even work by your side for a second, _slaughterer of Asgard's people_." His words were seethed at the end, anger coming full-force back quickly. "Sincerest apologies, Lady Death, however, I decline wholeheartedly."

"If you want to see Thor again, I can allow that to happen." Loki's brows raised in surprise as he was caught off guard, deciding it best to avoid such nicknames and to listen more carefully as Thor began concerned in the conversation. When Hela could see Loki relax just a minuscule amount, she continued, "I am the Goddess of death itself, and death rules under me. I can determine the fate of a person after death. And if saving this realm means bringing one dead back to life who has the potential to make a change to what is supposedly inevitable, then I will not hesitate to do so. Even if that person just so happens to be you, brother."

Loki pondered over the idea carefully. Despite it having not been long since he had arrived on this realm, he immediately wanted off although he couldn't do so without Hela giving him his life back. And what he wanted the most was to be at Thor's side again.

Hela suddenly stiffened on her throne, her eyes distant as a fumbled gasp left her lips causing dread to wash over Loki within quick succession. But Loki could feel the difference in the atmosphere of the realm, but he denied what he knew to be true. _No, it's too soon._

"What? What is it?" Loki asked urgently, a leak of desperation in his tone as he eyed his sister as she suddenly stood tall, a mask of indifference appearing on her face as she ran her hands across her hair, in place of the once present hair appeard her large antlers which looked less prominent than before, and she summoned two large blades at her sides.

"He did it. Half of all living population cease to exist." Loki blanched. So, it was true. But it was too _soon_ , Loki had only just given up the tesseract, although two infinity stones in his possession would have made Thanos the most powerful being in the universe, no one would be able to stand against him. Not even Thor's band of Avengers. But thinking back to what Hela said, you cannot accurately measure the rate of time on this realm. _We can only guess._

"What happens now?" Loki asked, holding his body strong as he stared at the large doors that were the entrance to the throne room. He could imagine the multitude of dead who now roamed the realm, the copious amount would soon be baring down the kingdom's doors, commanding rule.

Hela's gaze was determined as she spoke firmly, "now, we strike order on this realm, incite fear for those willing to go against their queen. We appear as ruthless, malevolent beings who will not cower under strife and we shall do what we must to ultimately outlive this dark age."

Loki sighed as resentment creeped up him quickly, seidr at the supply as he tensed for battle. Giving a solemn nod to his sister, he spoke, "and now, we can only wait."

 

 

 

**ASGARD 2013 AND AVENGERS HQ 2024**

 

Time travel. That was the ultimate plan. Retrieve the infinity stones in the timeline before Thanos did, return back to the present and use the stones in their favour, bringing back all those who perished in result of the snap. A sound plan. 

What Thor didn't entirely anticipate for was the rush of emotions that struck him as he stood in his home once again, his true home of Asgard which was thriving with prosperity. Appearing from the travel in one of the many grandiose halls, Thor had never felt more homesick in his life; he knew he couldn't stay despite all his desire to, he wasn't gifted with time and he knew he had to retrieve the infinity stone from Jane via Rocket's machination, and Thor realised that he couldn't mope around like he was. But just standing there, breathing in the air and seeing every structure in it's best condition and not quite yet charred by Ragnarok's destruction, made Thor teary-eyed at the sight. Everything was still here; Asgard's monuments and her people, Thor's friends, Fandral and Hogun and Volstagg who all fell valiantly under Hela's sword and Loki. Loki who currently stayed confined within the cell walls, _alive_. Thor had to see him, he _had_ to and although what resentment Loki may throw at him, Thor had to see him once more, remind him that he never stopped loving or caring or him despite hard times experienced together.

However, his train of thought broke with the sight of his mother, Thor moving closer to her as though as he being drawn inwards, her melodic voice then truly broke him. Seeing her for the first time in years had Thor transfixed, he watched her ethereal beauty as she was followed by her handmaidens, chattering away in the finest robes and gowns. He distantly heard Rocket ask something for he replied with a dazed, 'that's my mother', his _alive_ mother. Her life not yet taken by the dark elf beast. All Thor wanted to do was to run into her arms and cy, wish this all to be a nightmare and wake up a child again, to start all over with his family. _But the plan._ Thor didn't care in that moment. And so he was caught shortly after, hiding timidly behind a pillar by Frigga, his mother.

She led him to her rooms where she cared over him, asking him questions, 'what happened to your eye?', he lied terribly of course, the falseness of his words evident to any listening ear. Her attentive touches and caring looks made Thor feel as a child once more, her motherly care overwhelming as she concerned over him. Of course, she knew he was from the future which again he attempted to deny but his mother was one of the most powerful seidr wielders beyond the nine realms, 'I am so from the future', Thor had confessed weakly to her.

He knew he couldn't stay. It would only be time until he had to leave, when Rocket had retrieved the reality stone and found Thor eventually. Thor hugged his mother with as much passion as he could, his love sowed deep for the woman present in front of him, his gratitude immense for her as she spoke words of wisdom Thor needed to hear. Resting his forehead against hers, Thor cherished the moment. He got a chance to say goodbye to his mother as much as he wished he needn't do. Rocket had then disrupted the serene scene, demanding that they had to go. _Please don't make me go_. But he knew he had to. He spoke his love to his mother, for she replied wholeheartedly back. O, how he loved her so.

What one thing he could take from this past was his beloved Mjolnir. Reaching his hand outstretched out, Thor didn't expect much. He could feel the hammer's familiar thrum of magic and so he beckoned it towards him invitingly, just like he used to. When he could feel the recognisable pressure in his hand, he couldn't stop himself from crying out in joy and disbelief. He was still worthy! Although as he had aged and came to find that Mjolnir was only just a mantle for him to direct his power towards and an instrument to control his power under, he couldn't help but smile joyously at the sight of the hammer in his hand.

 _Loki_ , his mind echoed painfully, and so his hand froze, refraining from moving anywhere towards the control panel. He had to see him-he _had_ to. He just needed to get his ways to the cells, get past the guards inconspicuously and then he'll be able to see his brother again. However, Rocket wasn't feeling sympathetic anymore. "We don't have time for this, Thor. We must go!" And so, the rabbit quickly hit the dials on Thor's suit, allowing him no moment to protest as he could feel the suit contract within the air, pulling him forward in time, his last view being of his elegant mother teary-eyed, smiling graciously as she watched her son go. What a beautiful sight it was. 

Appearing back on the platform in the Avengers Headquarters, Thor just wished to go back. His ears dulled everything out as he thought of Asgard, thought of her once more in his mind and relived his travel. But that was all he could do now, was to think back to previous memories of Asgard, for it was gone. _Asgard is not a place, but a people_ , Heimdall's words echoed in his mind but that didn't help to erase the pain of his home being lost to him. Blinking slowly, Thor's awareness of the surroundings came back to him and he only then comprehended the sight of Clint hitting the metalled surface with his knees, his expression forlorn and regretful and he stared off into nothingness. Natasha wasn't there by his side. She too was gone. Bruce's grief was prominent as he tried to deny what was evident, _she couldn't be gone to him too._ Clint's words were distant, 'it was meant to be me', and a sombre atmosphere enveloped the entirety of the group.

What little Thor could make sense of in that very moment was his wraith. He wanted to avenge all those lost due to Thanos and all those he caused pain to. He wanted to avenge his brother, he wanted to avenge Heimdall and he wanted to avenge Natasha, and a multitude of people more. What little satisfaction Thor derived from his decapitation of Thanos' head, he knew would tenfold after their plan was successful for he didn't know what he'd do if he failed, one more time.

And so now, all Thor could do was mourn for his departed, dear friend Nat and pray. Pray to the Norns for strength and determination for what was to come, for Thor no longer feared his recklessness, instead he would embrace it, even if that foresaw Thor throwing his life down on the line for his friends because afterwards, consequences wouldn't matter to him when he would be reunited with his friends and family beyond Valhalla.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure when the next part of the Odinsons joining the battle will be posted as in two weeks, my GCSEs start and I have yet to begin revising. instead, ive just been curing my endgame and game of thrones pain with fix it fics,, o well
> 
> I didn't entirely check for any spelling or grammar mistakes in the last few paragraphs so apologies if there are any present :)

**Author's Note:**

> aw shit, just realised after posting that i wrote a plot point that caused my babies to not hug :( i just did a russo  
> however the next part is much better in my opinion and actually involves a hug


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